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Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts

Monday, September 15, 2014

Headless Chickens - Part 2


Welcome back, y'all!  Good to see you again!  I know you're anxious to get going, so let's get after it.  You're surrounded by Headless Chickens.  What do you do?  Here are a few tips.

1. Keep your head.  It sounds like a corny play on words based on the title of this post, but it's 100% true.  Think on it.  When you "lost your mind", what good were you for anyone?  For yourself?  What good did it do?  You accomplished nothing.  Here's what you do instead.  Keep calm.  Process the situation.  Make a decision and act on it.  Execute your plan.

2. Speak up.  Headless Chickens tend to squawk.  A lot.  And they do it loudly.  I can tell you why this happens and explain such behavior, but we'll explore those things in another post.  Make sure your voice gets heard.  Don't just sit there.  After you've assessed the situation, speak to it.  Speak on it.  Don't worry about being right.  This is to show that you're engaged (I can't believe I just used that word.  More on that in a few.) and that you're concerned and care.  Because you do.  At times, that gets lost on folk because of the Headless Chickens and their antics.  Don't let it.



3. Black and white.  Confused?  Don't be.  Listen.  You've taken everything in.  You've got the facts and necessary information.  After the meeting/session, head back to your office or your desk and put your plan on paper.  Whether that's electronic paper such as a Word document or an actual piece of paper.  Who cares?!  Just get it down.  While the Headless Chickens are running about, you're coming up with a plan.  For now and--watch this--the future.  After all, you've seen the future and it will be.  You'll have something to present to your manager and explain to her why your approach is a good option.  It doesn't have to be the best one all the time (Note: Please don't fall into that trap!  The trap of perfectionism.).   

Those are a few things to help you survive and thrive while in the midst of Headless Chickens.  I know you've got more.  Share them with us!  Remember, we're here to help one another.  

As promised, here's a final thought about that word I mentioned above: engaged.  Shamefully, some folk in leadership roles use it with a negative connotation.  They say that you're not engaged.  Allow me to translate that for you.  "You're not running around like a chicken with it's  head cut off like the rest of us.  Like me.  Because you're not doing so, that means you don't care and you're not getting anything done."  That'd be cool.  If it wasn't a lie. 

Hears the deal.  You care.  You are engaged.  It's just in ways that they don't notice.  We'll hit those in another post.  Side note: I'm starting to realize that this is going to require a bit more examination than I thought.  It's all good.  I promise to hit in full.  Back to the point.  You to need to realize that you engage for different reasons, in a different way, and with a different end in mind.  You want more than an engagement.  You want a good, solid marriage with your clients.  After all, you're a relationship builder.  And you want to build and cultivate strong, solid, mutually beneficial, and life-giving relationships.  

Their thinking shotgun wedding.  You're thinking, "Engagement?!  I never accepted the proposal!  And y'all want me to marry this mess?!  No thank you."  Friends, that's one of the reasons that you have to speak up.  You can't afford to be attached to that mess.  That's why you've got to have a plan in black and white.  It's why you must keep your head.  In spite of the criticism.  I promise you that it'll bear you out.  It may take some time (It will.).  It may not happen in your current role, but it will happen. 

I encourage you to fight the good fight against Headless Chickens.  Believe it or not, there's a few things you can learn from them.  See, I told y'all this thing requires more examination.  I'll get after it.  In the meantime, think of and share some of the other ways and tips that you use when you're surrounded by Headless Chickens.   Additionally, think of some new ways that you can and will try as well.  

I leave y'all with a lil' bit of Kipling.  That's Rudyard Kipling to you.  :-)  This is from his poem, If.  It applies to everyone.  I encourage you to think on it.  Apply it to your life.  To your situation.  Hang it on your wall.  Remember it when you're surrounded by Headless Chickens.  After all, it just may help to keep you engaged until you get the proposal you've been waiting for and the wedding you deserve. 

"If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs...Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!"




Friday, September 12, 2014

Rock On! Part 2


Iiiiiii’m baaaaaack!  Y'all miss me?  I missed you!  How’ve you been?!  Y’all ready for Part 2?  I'll warn you now, some of what I’m about to say is going to sound straight crazy.  It’ll even be foreign to some of you and that’s cool.  Still, stay with me.  Because…  “Yeah, Eric.  We know.  You’re going somewhere.”  My prized pupils.  You do listen to me after all.  Alright, now here we go.  

Here’s what I did after all that news today.  My day of deeply dented car doors and wack letters.  I knelt down in my Reaching Room (more on that in other posts, but you should have one too) and I cried out to God.  Expressing my love and gratitude for Him.  For his plan.  I expressed my trust in Him.  I said, “Lord, I know that none of this caught You off guard.  And although it’s new to me, I know that You’ve already got it worked out.”  After all, if I trust my life to this Cat—and I do—what’s a dented car door and a letter with some not so pleasant information?  Bigger Things, y’all. 

And aren’t I supposed to give thanks/be thankful in all circumstances (1 Thess. 5.18)?  Remind me to tell y’all how God rocked my life with that verse one day.  So, back to me being thankful in all circumstances.  Now, I’m not saying that I thanked Him for this.  Well, at least not with or in those words, but as I was praying, something strange started to happen.  This ain’t the strange part, but here’s what I did next.  I rebuked Satan and told him that this was a nice try but the old me is dead and this distraction that he’s thrown my way won’t work.  I hit him with a right cross of 1 John 4.4 and an uppercut of Philippians 4.19!  If you know me, you know that I don’t play when it comes to spiritual warfare, because it is not to be trifled in.  I suit up and I get after it!  I know you're wondering, "What's with the things God allows to happen in our lives?"  Good question.  Peep.  
 
Here’s the thing about what God allows in our lives.  See, if God allows something in our lives that means He’s ordained it.  That means it’s for our good (Note: I did not say it would feel good.).  Because He won’t allow anything that’s not going to help us grow and become more like His son, Jesus Christ.  If we respond the right way, He’ll get the glory for it and we’ll get the gain.  We’ll grow, y’all!  We’ll grow and become the persons He’s called us to be!  I mean, how cool is that?!  Ok, here’s the strange part.  I started to laugh.  Hysterically.  Uncontrollably.  And I was crying!  Cra.  Zy.  Wild, ain’t it, y’all?!  I was crackin’ up!  Now, I’m not going to get all deep and theological on y’all, but I started to understand something this evening.  I started to understand the term “tears of joy.”  Although I was crying, I was anything but sad.  I was encouraged!  I was excited!  I knew something was changing.  Something was different.  I laughed for many more minutes (say that fast 10 times).  Satan would have us be all down in the mouth and woe is me feeling and hiding in the bed under the covers and crying a different kind of tears than I cried today.  Trust me.  I’ve been there.  

Back then, it used to take me some time to come out of those funks.  Interesting, because I’d preach to other folk, “It’s ok to feel that way, you just can’t stay there.”  Aren’t we good at helping other folk, but awful at taking and applying our own advice, y’all?  Oh, so y’all are going to front on me and not raise your hands or nod your heads in agreement?  Ok.  That’s better.  If we’re going to be cool, y’all have to keep it real and be honest with me.  I’m doing and will do the same.  Cool?  Cool.  Back to my laughter.  I’m calling it Holy Laughter.  Yep.  I said it.  Sounds wild to me too.  It’s the only way I know how to describe it, because I had no reason to be laughing.  It was different than the kind of laughing we do when we hear funny jokes or we’re watching our favorite movies or TV shows.  I’ll tell y’all something else.  It felt good.  In fact, it was more than good.  It felt great.  I had (still have) complete peace about it all.  Why?  Because God’s in control.  Remember, I trust Him with my life.  Hello!  How can I not trust Him to provide me with the wisdom and necessary resources to handle this?  Chil’ please!  This ain’t nuttin’ but a ultraperm (Thank you, Eddie Murphy.).  My faith runs deep, y’all.  It has to, because I’ve got work to do. 

Y’all have more to say?  Cool.  What’s up?  “Thanks, Eric.  I dig what you’re sayin, but it sounds a little weird.  But, um, if a person wanted to, what could a person do to get like this or experience this?  Or at least get some understanding?  You know.  If a person wanted to.”  Well, if a person wanted to and said person doesn’t know who Jesus is, you’d start there.  Find out who He is.  Read about Him.  In the bible.  You know, it’s that dusty book that’s under your bed, on your bookshelf, in the dresser drawer or wherever you keep it.  It’s the one you break out when your Mama or Aunt or Bro. Johnson from the church you sometimes go to comes by to hang out.  A good place to start is in the Gospels.  Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.  Read them.  All of them.  After that, let’s talk.  Because once you’re done reading them, things may seem a wee bit different for you.  Around you.  In you.  You may find yourself feeling a bit differently.  Just like I was today.  But also just like me, you can find yourself laughing and being joyful in the midst of chaos.  All you’ve got to do is Rock On!