That Is Why It Must Be You!

Ok, y'all.  Watch this clip.  Then we'll get started.  I'll wait...  All done?  No?  Ok...  Ready?  Cool.  Let's go.  "Maximus, that is why it must be you!"  That's a powerful scene.  Imagine if you were General Maximus.  You haven't been home to see your family in years.  You're weary and worn.  You're also sworn to duty.  To honor and defend.  You've also got the ear of the most powerful man in the world.  Trade-offs.  There's some lessons in that phrase alone.  Hmmm...  We'll get to those, but for now, I want you to focus on what Marcus Aurelius says to Maximus after Maximus tells him that he does not accept Caesar's charge of becoming the protector of Rome after he dies.  He says, "Maximus.  That is why it must be you!"

That is why it must be you.

Just like Maximus, you've been charged.  You've got a charge to keep.  Whether you know it or not, you do.  See, you think no one wants to hear you.  False!  Not only do they want to hear you, but they also need to hear you.  You think, "Well, everything's been said."  Maybe.  But know this.  Your message is unique because it's yours and it's coming from you.  And there's not a single other person on this planet that can bring that message across like you.  There's a group of folk you've been called to that need your message.  They need you.  

That is why it must be you!

You think you don't have a voice.  Wrong!  It may have been squelched.  It may have been on pause.  Maybe for years.  But I assure you, dear reader, you have a voice.  It needs to be heard.  Your unique and special voice.  Called and sent for a specific group of folk.

That is why it must be you.

You think it's over.  They told you it was.  You know them.  That stuff.  Those things.  Them folk.  Flag on the play!  It ain't over, maaaaan!  It's only just begun.  Yes, I just went all Karen Carpenter on y'all!  It's only over when you quit.  As long as you're here, you've got a shot.  At whatever it is.  You hear me?!  You've got a shot!

That is why it must be you!

You still have a lil' belief left.  A lil' faith.  It might even be the size of a mustard seed.  Come close.  I've got a secret to tell you.  Closer.  Closer.  Can you hear me?  Are you listening?  Good.  All you need is a lil' faith to spark a blaze!  To spark the fire that burns within you.  To ignite the night with your passion.

That is why it must be you!

You've been told that you can't.  Why?  Because they couldn't?  Because they wouldn't?  Because they can't?  Chil' please!  Later for them.  You need to run as fast as you can in the opposite direction from them folk!  Here's the thing: You can!  Can what?  Can whatever!  Sure, you'll need some help.  You'll ask for it.  You'll get it.  You'll have to get a few PhDs, but you're ready, willing, and able to put in the work.  You're hungry!  Baby, you've got what it takes!

That is why it must be you!

You've been told that you'll never be anything.  That's cool.  Folk are entitled to their opinions.  No matter how wrong they are.  Don't you fight those tears.  Let 'em flow.  Let 'em fuel you.  That statement is a lie!  You'll be and become exactly who you're destined to be.  It's already in you.  Growing up, I'd see these posters that said, "I know I'm somebody, 'cause God don't make no junk!"  That's what I'm saying to you today.  You are something and somebody, 'cause God don't make no junk.

That is why it must be you!

You've been told that nothing good comes from (insert your city, town, school, neighborhood, family name here).  Funny.  I seem to remember something similar being said before.  That seemed to turn out pretty well.  And it will for you too.

That is why it must be you!

You've been called a failure.  To that I say two things.  The first is something we'd say as kids.  "Takes one to know one and I know you."  The second thing is this.  You are a failure.  Yep.  I said it.  'Cause you're about to Fail Ur way to victory!

That is why it must be you!

I don't know where you are.  I don't know why you're reading this.  I don't know how you stumbled upon my blog.  I don't know what's going on in your life.  I probably don't even know you.  And none of it matters.  Here's what does matter.  I know there's more for you.  I know there's more in you.  I know that you've been called to do great things!  I know there's greatness in you!  I know that it's time for what you've got to shine!  I know that it's time for you to move on up like George and Weezie!  I know that it's time for you to soar!  I know that you were made for this!  I know that you are built for this!

That is why it must be you!

I believe in you!  I know that you're ready to get in the car.  As the fire burns away the dross.  As the cleansing and healing rain washes away the miry clay.  As you strut past death and dead bones.  As you ascend unto and beyond the heights that you thought were impossible.  As you take your throne and restore your kingdom.  As you breathe new life.  I need you to know something.  You need to know that it is time.

That is why it must be you!

Headless Chickens - Part 2

Welcome back, y'all!  Good to see you again!  I know you're anxious to get going, so let's get after it.  You're surrounded by Headless Chickens.  What do you do?  Here are a few tips.

1. Keep your head.  It sounds like a corny play on words based on the title of this post, but it's 100% true.  Think on it.  When you "lost your mind", what good were you for anyone?  For yourself?  What good did it do?  You accomplished nothing.  Here's what you do instead.  Keep calm.  Process the situation.  Make a decision and act on it.  Execute your plan.

2. Speak up.  Headless Chickens tend to squawk.  A lot.  And they do it loudly.  I can tell you why this happens and explain such behavior, but we'll explore those things in another post.  Make sure your voice gets heard.  Don't just sit there.  After you've assessed the situation, speak to it.  Speak on it.  Don't worry about being right.  This is to show that you're engaged (I can't believe I just used that word.  More on that in a few.) and that you're concerned and care.  Because you do.  At times, that gets lost on folk because of the Headless Chickens and their antics.  Don't let it.

3. Black and white.  Confused?  Don't be.  Listen.  You've taken everything in.  You've got the facts and necessary information.  After the meeting/session, head back to your office or your desk and put your plan on paper.  Whether that's electronic paper such as a Word document or an actual piece of paper.  Who cares?!  Just get it down.  While the Headless Chickens are running about, you're coming up with a plan.  For now and--watch this--the future.  After all, you've seen the future and it will be.  You'll have something to present to your manager and explain to her why your approach is a good option.  It doesn't have to be the best one all the time (Note: Please don't fall into that trap!  The trap of perfectionism.).   

Those are a few things to help you survive and thrive while in the midst of Headless Chickens.  I know you've got more.  Share them with us!  Remember, we're here to help one another.  

As promised, here's a final thought about that word I mentioned above: engaged.  Shamefully, some folk in leadership roles use it with a negative connotation.  They say that you're not engaged.  Allow me to translate that for you.  "You're not running around like a chicken with it's  head cut off like the rest of us.  Like me.  Because you're not doing so, that means you don't care and you're not getting anything done."  That'd be cool.  If it wasn't a lie. 

Hears the deal.  You care.  You are engaged.  It's just in ways that they don't notice.  We'll hit those in another post.  Side note: I'm starting to realize that this is going to require a bit more examination than I thought.  It's all good.  I promise to hit in full.  Back to the point.  You to need to realize that you engage for different reasons, in a different way, and with a different end in mind.  You want more than an engagement.  You want a good, solid marriage with your clients.  After all, you're a relationship builder.  And you want to build and cultivate strong, solid, mutually beneficial, and life-giving relationships.  

Their thinking shotgun wedding.  You're thinking, "Engagement?!  I never accepted the proposal!  And y'all want me to marry this mess?!  No thank you."  Friends, that's one of the reasons that you have to speak up.  You can't afford to be attached to that mess.  That's why you've got to have a plan in black and white.  It's why you must keep your head.  In spite of the criticism.  I promise you that it'll bear you out.  It may take some time (It will.).  It may not happen in your current role, but it will happen. 

I encourage you to fight the good fight against Headless Chickens.  Believe it or not, there's a few things you can learn from them.  See, I told y'all this thing requires more examination.  I'll get after it.  In the meantime, think of and share some of the other ways and tips that you use when you're surrounded by Headless Chickens.   Additionally, think of some new ways that you can and will try as well.  

I leave y'all with a lil' bit of Kipling.  That's Rudyard Kipling to you.  :-)  This is from his poem, If.  It applies to everyone.  I encourage you to think on it.  Apply it to your life.  To your situation.  Hang it on your wall.  Remember it when you're surrounded by Headless Chickens.  After all, it just may help to keep you engaged until you get the proposal you've been waiting for and the wedding you deserve. 

"If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs...Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,

And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!"

Transitions: Get In the Car

Everything you need to know about The 90s.

Ahh, the 90s.  Such great times.  From VH1's Pop-Up Videos to Saved By the Bell to Steve Urkel and his beloved cheese.  I always wondered if he loved cheese more than he loved Laura Winslow.  And what about Myra?  And science?  And Carl "Big Guy" Winslow?  And.  Oh.  Sorry, I got distracted.  Some say the 90s were the last great decade.  I think I agree with them, but we'll cover the 90s some other time.  One last thing about that great decade though.  Remember the hip-hop group Arrested Development?  They had a few hit songs.  Most notably, the song Tennessee.  It was from their album 3 Years, 5 Months & 2 Days in the Life Of...  An interesting title.  Of course, it has significance.  It's how long it took them to get a record deal.  The length of time it took them to transition from being virtually unknown to superstardom!  Sadly, as with many bands, Arrested Development broke up due to...  You guessed it.  Creative differences.  A short, but fun-filled ride it was!  It took them a few years, but they made it!  This is the part where you envision Arthur "Cody" Jarrett, played by James Cagney in the film noir White Heat delivering those famous last words as he's perched atop of round, gigantic gas tanks.  "Made it, Ma! Top of the world!".  As usual, I hear you.  "Eric, what are you talking about?"  Stay with me.  I'm going somewhere.  Arrested Development transitioned.  In his own unique way, so did Cody Jarrett.  Now, I'm transitioning.  No, literally.  I'm headed into the next, best phase in my life.  I reckon I always was.  See, I was never satisfied with where I was or what I was doing.  I'd gone to college and majored in Business and Economics and made a pretty decent career for myself over the years, but it wasn't enough.  Something was missing.

Still, I pressed on like Lee Nails.  I worked my way into management and had my eyes keenly set on the corner office with the mahogany desk, bookshelf, and plush leather chair.  When I made it there, this lil' boy from Akron, Ohio was going to be all set!  One problem.  I never made it to the corner office.  Why?  That story will come out over the course of many posts, because it's multi-layered and was quite the journey.  Back to the point.  After doing all that I needed to do there, I left my previous employer, BISYS Fund Services, and headed to work for JPMorgan Chase (JPMC).  It was a promotion, a better opportunity, and you guessed it.  An increase in salary!   Hey, my Mama ain't raise no fools!  My journey to the corner office was reborn!   Or so I thought.  But alas, it was not meant to be.  And that brings me to today.  This moment.  There were ups and downs and ins and outs while I was there.  Frustrations.  Joys.  Happy times.  Sadness.  Anger.  Smiles.  Laughter.  All the time I was there, I couldn't wait to get out of there!  I even wrote a poem about it called, "Death March to Freedom".  It was about the day that I'd leave there and how much they'd realize what they'd lost.  I'd walk out and not miss a thing about that place!  There!  Take that!  But now that it's here and it's happening?  I find myself getting sad.  No, not because of the folk I'm leaving.  The relationships that need to continue will continue.  I just NEVER thought I'd miss that place!  Ever!  Did I say never?!  Ok, sorry.  I was having a moment.  As I contemplated the cause of my sadness, it hit me.  Much of the growing that I've done over the time that I was there was critical and crucial to where I am now and where I'm heading.  It was and continues to be an integral part of my story.  Boy, I didn't see that coming!  Hit me like a freight train!  But you see, it's because of the pruning, pressing places, and growth process that occurred during my time at BISYS and even more so at JPMC, that I'm finally able to walk away.  I had to get to a point where I would allow--yes, allow--God to do the work in and on me that He knew needed to be done.  I had to get to the point where I was Sweetly Broken.  Where I was finally willing to put it ALL In His Hands.


It's only then that we begin to live life wide open.  It was only then, only now, where I've been able to hear His voice calling me.  Clearly.  Gently.  No mistaking it.  No confusion.  It's only now that I know that my gifts and talents will be used for more than a cheap pop.  For more than a brief mountaintop moment.  I've always known there was more in me, but I wasn't always quite sure that it'd get the opportunity to come out.  I can tell you this much.  There's no way it should have come out before now.  If so, it would have been a mess.  A complete one.  Utterly and totally.  See, if you know me well, you know that I can be a tough nut to crack and God had to refine me.  I had to go through the Refiner's Fire (Note: Please be patient with me.  I’m still being refined.  Always will be.).  Not the most pleasant experience in my life.  Tears.  Lots of 'em.  Brokenness.  Lots of it.  Healing.  Lots of it too.  If you've ever been in that fire or you're in it now, can I get an Amen?!  'Cause it ain't no joke!  It's so rough, I had to use a double negative just now.  Did ya catch that?  Sorry, I got distracted again.  Ok, I'm back on course.  See y'all, the Lord is willing to heal those broken places, but we've got to be willing to give them to Him.  ALL of it.  In totality.  "But Eric, you don't know what happened!  It hurts!"  You're right.  I don't know what happened.  I don't know exactly how badly it hurts.  What I do know is that if you surrender that stuff, those things, them folk, what happened, and what they said or did.  If you give it to the Healer, He'll see to it that love will have the final word. 

How do I know?  Because it's having the final word as I transition.  I finally received permission to leave JPMC and do what He's called me to do and be all that He's called me to be.  What's that, you ask?  Stay tuned.  For now, know this.  It came as a bit of a shock to me.  I was hoping to be able to throw out a fleece like Gideon.  Nope.  Am I scared?  No.  Was I a little afraid at some point?  Yes.  I can hear you again.  "Wow, Eric!  You're super-brave!"  No, I'm not.  I'm just a man who knows the voice of his Shepherd.  A man who knows it's his time.  A man who trusts God.  A man who won't be looking back and wishing that he'd gotten in the car.  So, as I transition, I want you to do the same thing.  That is, I want you to...   No, you need to take some shots!  Take some risks!  Yes, you'll be challenged, but know that you can count on God's presence.  If He's told you to go, then GO!  Go with courage!  Is it risky?  Yep.  You'll likely never have complete assurance, but if you did, would that be faith?  So, ask, seek, and knock.  Find out what you can.  Warning!  He's not going to tell you everything.  At some point, you'll just have to trust Him.  I've reached that point and I know it's my time to transition and Get In the Car.  

   

Rock On! Part 2

Iiiiiii’m baaaaaack!  Y'all miss me?  I missed you!  How’ve you been?!  Y’all ready for Part 2?  I'll warn you now, some of what I’m about to say is going to sound straight crazy.  It’ll even be foreign to some of you and that’s cool.  Still, stay with me.  Because…  “Yeah, Eric.  We know.  You’re going somewhere.”  My prized pupils.  You do listen to me after all.  Alright, now here we go.  

Here’s what I did after all that news today.  My day of deeply dented car doors and wack letters.  I knelt down in my Reaching Room (more on that in other posts, but you should have one too) and I cried out to God.  Expressing my love and gratitude for Him.  For his plan.  I expressed my trust in Him.  I said, “Lord, I know that none of this caught You off guard.  And although it’s new to me, I know that You’ve already got it worked out.”  After all, if I trust my life to this Cat—and I do—what’s a dented car door and a letter with some not so pleasant information?  Bigger Things, y’all. 

And aren’t I supposed to give thanks/be thankful in all circumstances (1 Thess. 5.18)?  Remind me to tell y’all how God rocked my life with that verse one day.  So, back to me being thankful in all circumstances.  Now, I’m not saying that I thanked Him for this.  Well, at least not with or in those words, but as I was praying, something strange started to happen.  This ain’t the strange part, but here’s what I did next.  I rebuked Satan and told him that this was a nice try but the old me is dead and this distraction that he’s thrown my way won’t work.  I hit him with a right cross of 1 John 4.4 and an uppercut of Philippians 4.19!  If you know me, you know that I don’t play when it comes to spiritual warfare, because it is not to be trifled in.  I suit up and I get after it!  I know you're wondering, "What's with the things God allows to happen in our lives?"  Good question.  Peep.  

 

Here’s the thing about what God allows in our lives.  See, if God allows something in our lives that means He’s ordained it.  That means it’s for our good (Note: I did not say it would feel good.).  Because He won’t allow anything that’s not going to help us grow and become more like His son, Jesus Christ.  If we respond the right way, He’ll get the glory for it and we’ll get the gain.  We’ll grow, y’all!  We’ll grow and become the persons He’s called us to be!  I mean, how cool is that?!  Ok, here’s the strange part.  I started to laugh.  Hysterically.  Uncontrollably.  And I was crying!  Cra.  Zy.  Wild, ain’t it, y’all?!  I was crackin’ up!  Now, I’m not going to get all deep and theological on y’all, but I started to understand something this evening.  I started to understand the term “tears of joy.”  Although I was crying, I was anything but sad.  I was encouraged!  I was excited!  I knew something was changing.  Something was different.  I laughed for many more minutes (say that fast 10 times).  Satan would have us be all down in the mouth and woe is me feeling and hiding in the bed under the covers and crying a different kind of tears than I cried today.  Trust me.  I’ve been there.  

Back then, it used to take me some time to come out of those funks.  Interesting, because I’d preach to other folk, “It’s ok to feel that way, you just can’t stay there.”  Aren’t we good at helping other folk, but awful at taking and applying our own advice, y’all?  Oh, so y’all are going to front on me and not raise your hands or nod your heads in agreement?  Ok.  That’s better.  If we’re going to be cool, y’all have to keep it real and be honest with me.  I’m doing and will do the same.  Cool?  Cool.  Back to my laughter.  I’m calling it Holy Laughter.  Yep.  I said it.  Sounds wild to me too.  It’s the only way I know how to describe it, because I had no reason to be laughing.  It was different than the kind of laughing we do when we hear funny jokes or we’re watching our favorite movies or TV shows.  I’ll tell y’all something else.  It felt good.  In fact, it was more than good.  It felt great.  I had (still have) complete peace about it all.  Why?  Because God’s in control.  Remember, I trust Him with my life.  Hello!  How can I not trust Him to provide me with the wisdom and necessary resources to handle this?  Chil’ please!  This ain’t nuttin’ but a ultraperm (Thank you, Eddie Murphy.).  My faith runs deep, y’all.  It has to, because I’ve got work to do. 

Y’all have more to say?  Cool.  What’s up?  “Thanks, Eric.  I dig what you’re sayin, but it sounds a little weird.  But, um, if a person wanted to, what could a person do to get like this or experience this?  Or at least get some understanding?  You know.  If a person wanted to.”  Well, if a person wanted to and said person doesn’t know who Jesus is, you’d start there.  Find out who He is.  Read about Him.  In the bible.  You know, it’s that dusty book that’s under your bed, on your bookshelf, in the dresser drawer or wherever you keep it.  It’s the one you break out when your Mama or Aunt or Bro. Johnson from the church you sometimes go to comes by to hang out.  A good place to start is in the Gospels.  Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.  Read them.  All of them.  After that, let’s talk.  Because once you’re done reading them, things may seem a wee bit different for you.  Around you.  In you.  You may find yourself feeling a bit differently.  Just like I was today.  But also just like me, you can find yourself laughing and being joyful in the midst of chaos.  All you’ve got to do is Rock On!                    

Headless Chickens - Part 1

I know half of y'all passed out just from reading the title.  Some of you were hoping and praying that I wouldn't have a gruesome picture of a headless chicken in this post.  See, the pic is nice and chill.  Nothing crazy.  I wouldn't do that to y'all.  But let me tell you about the process.  First, you...  Huh?  Y'all don't want to know?  Chickens!  You're all chickens!  I'm kidding, y'all.  But the question is, is that a pic of you?  And if it is, is that how you operate?  If so, you're in trouble and you've got to make some changes.  Fast!

I spent many years in Corporate America watching folk--many of whom called themselves leaders and were looked upon in that way by folk around them--run around like the chicken in the above pic.  Why were they called and viewed as being leaders?  Great question.  That's what I used to ask myself.  Because I noticed something about these folk.  These headless chickens: They rarely accomplished anything at all, let alone anything of substance.  Well, that's not entirely true.  I reckon they got their exercise in for the day.  But then, wasn't it all for naught (Side note: I just tried to make for naught into one word. Hilarious stuff!), because they're stress levels were so high?  Smh.  See, I can do that (Shake My Head), because I still have my head.

So what's the other side of that?  What are you if you're not a headless chicken?  What are you?  How do you handle being a guess what?  Gotcha!  99.9999982% of you said to yourselves, "Chicken Butt!"  C'mon.  Admit it.  You did it and you're still smiling and laughing.  Good.  You need to smile and laugh.  A lot.  But let's get back to those questions.  What do you do or what are you if you're not a headless chicken?  Maybe you're the calming influence or presence that's needed.  If you know me, you know that I'm pretty laid back most of the time.  I tend to stay fairly even.  I gotta tell you.  That frustrates headless chickens to no end!  They lose their...  Oh, I guess they can't lose their minds since they've already got dead heads.  Now, see.  Some of you just started singing you're favorite Grateful Dead song.  I can hear y'all.  You're saying, "Eric, man I'm jammin' and rockin' out over here!  Keep the music comin', bud!"  No worries there.  My students will tell you that I tend to work in lots of songs when I'm teaching.  I can't help it.  I love music, y'all!  Lots of lessons in songs and they make for great teaching topics and provide great assistance when teaching.  But we'll rock on and out in other posts.  I promise.  Let's get back to these headless chickens.  

If you're not a headless chicken, are you a headed chicken?  Nope.  You're a leader.  You may not want to be.  You may not think you are.  But you're a leader.  Peep this.  Take a stroll back down memory lane (Sorry, y'all.  I couldn't resist.).  Think back on those times when the headless chickens were running all around you.  Wings flailing.  Running around with no direction and no destination, because there was nothing guiding them.  Ask yourselves this.  Headless chickens got much of the attention, but when folk really needed guidance, wisdom, and direction about things, who did they come to?  Yep.  It was you.  You never thought much about it, did you?  Well, now's the time to do so.  Because you were that calming, clear-minded influence that people needed.  I know.  I know.  Lo, these many years, The Headless Chickens had you believing that you weren't doing enough.  Well, they were and are wrong!  So what's a person who's kept and still keeps her or his head in place to do?  Great question.

The first thing you can do is...  Tune in next week to find out.  Now, don't be like that, y'all.  I'll be back.  I promise.  Until then...  Be E-Z.  Be Blessed.  Be A Blessing.  Peace.  

Rock On! Part 1

Rocked.  Ever have one of those days?  You know the kind.  Things are just not going well.  Whether it’s one thing or many things, you can’t seem to win.  These are the kinds of days that make us wish that we’d have stayed in bed.  If only there was a way to fast forward past them or rewind back to the good ol’ days with the added bonus of being able to see the future so you can skip those days.  If only.  Well, dear readers, today was one of those days for me.  Wrote a song about it.  Wanna hear it?  Here it goes!  Kidding.  Y’all were waiting and looking for a hyperlink to a song or maybe even me singing.  Maybe one day, but not today.  Instead, let me tell you about my day.

I came out of the building to get into my car and from a distance, I see what looks to be some scratches on the passenger side door.  No big deal, I thought.  Once I get closer, I see that it’s more than just a few scratches.  My car’s been hit!  The door is dented and scraped down to the primer!  This has to have been done by an SUV or truck with a metal bumper.  Did I tell y’all that I’m also an amateur detective?  Well, now you know.  Ok, back to the point.  Guess what else.  To top it all off, my door won’t open without a decent amount of effort!  Do you think there was a note on my window?  Nope.  As you can imagine, I was hot!  Boiling!  But I didn’t stay in that place.  I couldn’t afford to.  It’s a car.  Now, make no mistake.  I was angry.  I can hear you saying, “Eric, you’re a cool cat who’s better than me, because I’d have had a fit!”  I know.  If we dial the clock back a bit, I’d have done the same thing.  But now, I’ve got perspective.  I know what matters.  The main point of my frustration about it?  The dishonesty.  Leave a note.  Fess up.  Don’t scoot off and say, “Oh well.”  That’s pretty funny, because that’s exactly what I said a little while later after I was done venting.  No, I’m not that cool, so stop saying it.  Remember what I said to y’all in my post Bigger Things?  Yep.  Time to live my own words.  I did.  Y’all would have been proud.  I let it go.  I let it ride (pun intended).  Wooosaaahhh.  After all, what was I going to do?  It was all good.  Not a major deal.  Until I got home.

I get home and get the mail out of the mailbox.  All of a sudden I can hear the opening line from Chuck D. in Public Enemy’s Black Steel in the Hour of Chaos.  "I got a letter from the government. The other day..."  Except it wasn’t that kind of letter.  It was big enough to rock my world.  And not in the way Michael Jackson sings about that woman.  You see, I’m a man of faith.  A follower of Jesus Christ.  I speak faith.  I live it.  I tell it to other folk.  I tell other folk to do it too.  Well, this letter was testing my faith.  Y’all!  First the car and now this!  Time to blow a gasket, right?!  I can still hear you.  “Yeah, Eric!  It’s time to let ‘er rip!  Let ‘em have it!  Sock it to ‘em, bud!”  Sounds good.  Might even feel good.  But only to my flesh.  Temporarily.  See, that’s the way I’d have responded prior to January of this year.  Angrily.  Fearful.  Fretful.  Now?  Naw, dawg.  That cat is dead!  The old me.  He’s gone.  Y’all are talkative today, because I can hear you yet again.  You’re saying, “Huh?  Eric, what do you mean?  Dead?  You look alive and well to me here in Internetland.  I think I get it, but what are you saying?”  I’m glad you asked.  Stay with me.  I’m going somewhere.

See, I used to respond like that.  To everything.  About everything.  Before I go any further, let me clear something up.  Yes.  I still get angry, frustrated, flat out mad, and any other emotions you want to list.  So don’t think that I’m saying my life is always sunny and 75 degrees (that’s 24 degrees Celsius for my international audience).  Got me?  Cool.  Like I was saying, I used to be all angry and shaken and all that jazz.  Until I realized, what’s the point?  If I really believe all the Jesus stuff I was spittin’, then what am I buggin’ for?  Why am I trippin’?  Exactly.  So I stopped.  Y’all still have more to say?  “Umm, yes, Eric.  So what do you do now?  How do you respond when the top caves in and the bottom drops out?  Because I just lose my…”  Whoa.  Slow down there, sport.  Here’s what I do.  I get angry, but I don’t stay in that place.  I get scared, but I don’t stay there or dwell on it.  In short, I express.  Oh, and I pray.  Man, do I pray!  I cry out to the Lord!  Sometimes, it’s literally me crying.  No, not tears of sadness necessarily.  Sometimes, they're tears of joy and thankfulness.  And today I learned more about what those really are.  You wanna know?  Peep.  Come back next week for Part 2.  I know.  I know.  Sorry, y'all.  Trust me.  It'll be worth the wait.  Until then, be e-z.  Peace.

Now or Then?

"I've seen the future and it will be.  I've seen the future and it works."  That's a lyric from Prince's song The Future from the Batman (1989) soundtrack.  I've seen the future and it will be.  If you stew on that for a bit, it's a pretty good play on words.  And if y'all know anything about me, you might want to know this: I really appreciate good word play.  And this is very good word play.  The future.  Always an immensely popular subject.  Whether it's in a cartoon like the Jetsons or a movie such as Robocop, we've long held a great fascination with the future.  It is with great anticipation that many of us look forward to and toward the future.  The future is cool.  And it's so far away, right?  So we've got plenty of time.  After all, it is the future.  But what if I told you that now is the future?  That today, the very day that you're reading this is the future.  That somebody's one day, that some day is today.  That this very moment is somebody's future.  Yours.  

We tend to treat the future as though it's eons away and that we've got more than enough time to plan and prepare for it.  Whatever it is, it can wait until tomorrow.  Y'all know how we do.  We say, "I'll get my degree tomorrow."  "I'll start my business in a year."  "I'll express my real feelings.  One day..."  "I'll write that blog post that's been burning inside of me.  Tomorrow."  Don't front on me, y'all.  That's how we roll.  We've got time.  We'll play that game with our kids tomorrow.  We'll teach 'em how to ride their bike next week.  We'll eventually help mom, dad, granddad, or grandma with those chores.  One day.  We are the kings and queens of procrastination.  And it's ok.  Because we're busy.  We lead such busy lives.  Some things just have to wait.  Right?  Of course they do.  And tomorrow is coming, so we're good.  We've got this!  Except for one thing.  Tomorrow.  Is.  Today.

In truth, none of us know how many more tomorrow's we've got left.  We hope and pray that we've got many, many, many.  But we don't know for sure.  Now don't go getting sad on me.  Just realize it for what it is.  This isn't a, "If today were your last day on earth, what would you do" post.  It's different.  I hope it's more than that.  Stay with me.  I'm going somewhere.  

How many of you know what a legacy is?  Show of hands.  Ok, cool.  Most of you know or have some idea what it is.  It's that future thing.  You know, the stuff that can wait.  The stuff you do when you're old.  The stuff folk say about you when you're old or when you're no longer here.   That's it, right?  Not exactly.  Dear readers, whether you realize it or not, your legacy is now.  You're building it right now.  In everything you do.  In everything you say.  In some way shape or form, you are a living legacy.  Uh oh.  I just said something.  Y'all know I can hear you mumbling, so out with it.  "Ok, Eric.  I thought you were going to uplift and encourage in these posts.  All I feel is sad and like I've lost time.  What are you saying?"  I'm saying that you're building a now legacy in all that you do.  See, we tend to think of a legacy as something that's far away from now.  Waaaaayyyy off in the distant future.  Newsflash, y'all.  That ain't true.  

Friends, whether we realize it or not, we're building now legacies.  So shouldn't we want to build something that's going to last?  Something that will be remembered for the good and positive impact it had on folk?  Yes, we should.  So how do we do it?  I'm so glad you asked.

One of the ways we can build a successful now legacy is by building solid and deep personal relationships.  Here's a few tips on building those types of relationships:


1. Know yourself.  If you're honest with this, you'll dig deeply into who you are and why you are that way.  I'll warn you now, it could be one of the best decisions you've ever made.  Think on it.  How in the world are folk going to connect with you, touch you, and receive what you have for them if you're not sure who you really are?

2. Be yourself.  Sounds simple, doesn't it?  Until you realize that you've got on so many layers of this and masks that show that, you don't know who you really are.  Therefore, you can't be yourself.  What's more is you can't share yourself with others although that's exactly what you should be doing.  That is, giving yourself away.

Dear readers, these are just a couple of the ways that you can actively build your now legacy.  I'd say it's a pretty good start.  What's that?  "Umm, Eric?  That was interesting.  What if a person wanted to hear and learn more about this stuff?  Will you have more posts about it?"  Great question.  If a person wanted to hear and learn more about it, a person should join me on Friday, October 10, 2014.  I'll be teaching on this very topic at the L2: Learn - Lead Conference.  Tickets are still available, but hurry!  They're going fast!  Click the link below for more details!  I'll see you there!

http://www.wordtalkproductions.com/take-action/
  

PhD

PhD.  Doctor of Philosophy.  Dictionary.com defines PhD as, “…the highest degree awarded by a graduate school, usually to a person who has completed at least three years of graduate study and a dissertation approved by a board of professors.”  I thought about obtaining my PhD, but after completing my master’s degree in business management, I was done.  No more degrees for this guy!  Now it was time to get paid!  That would have been nice.  If it actually happened.  Oh, well.  More on that in future posts.  PhD.  You want one, don't you?  The prestige.  The honor.  The juice.  No, not that kind of juice.  I’m talking about clout.   Respect.  Pull.  How cool would it be to have a PhD?!  All of your hard work would be worth it, right?  It better be.  Because you’ll have to put in a ton of work to obtain your PhD.  But you know what?  Based on my definition of PhD, I reckon that some of you already have your PhD.  “Eric.  Eric.  Eric.  You’re a funny man!  I’ve got my high school diploma.  I did a couple of years at State, but I didn’t finish.  So, once again, thanks, but you’re wrong, bud.”  I’m serious, y’all.  Some of you already have at least one PhD.  I’ll prove it.

Are you a business owner?  Or maybe you’re highly respected at your place of employment?  Maybe you’re finally pursuing your ever-elusive college degree.  No, I got it.  You’re walking in your calling.  Your destiny.  See.  P-H-D.  Many of you have one.  Where are my dream-builders?  They’ve got PhDs.  Dream-builders know.  Business-builders.  Y’all know.  Anyone who's ever had a dream and worked on bringing it to fruition knows.  PhDs ain't for the faint of heart.  It's messy stuff.  It's dirty stuff.  PhDs are costly.  Are you ready to pay?  Better yet, are you able to pay?  How do you know?  How do you know that this, this PhD that you’re about to pursue, if this is it or if it's just something you dig quite a bit?  I’ll share one way for you to know.  If you let go of it, but it won't let you go?  That's one way to know.  In truth, there's no perfect answer.  You're probably going to have to try many things before you find it.  Trial and error?  Probably in the beginning.  But at some point, you'll be drawn towards your natural gifts.  Strongly.  You'll flow effortlessly in them.  Some of you may already know what they are. You may know exactly what your it is.  If so, good for you. However, for most of you, it's going to take some digging. Some experimenting. You're going to have to dig your hands in the dirt.  Why?  Because 50 years from now you don't want to look back and say that you didn't get in the car.  

I can hear you again.  “Eric.  Are you sure you’re talking about a PhD?”  Dear reader, I assure you that I am.  Stay with me.  I’m going somewhere.  The traditional meaning of PhD, Doctor of Philosophy, is one type of PhD.  I’m talking about the other PhD.  Passion.  Hurt.  Destiny.  You are passionate about this thing you’re doing and pursuing, right?  If so, then you know that passion hurts.  You're going to have to dig deep, because passion hurts.  Passion requires sacrifice.   And you’re passionate about this thing, right?  If so, you know that it also requires hope.  It requires dogged pursuit.  What's that?  Ever seen a dog chase a squirrel, rabbit, or another dog?  Maybe you’ve seen a cheetah chasing its prey?  Especially a cheetah chasing its prey.  Furious.  Relentless.  Great speed.  Stride for stride with its prey.  Tenacity.  Exhaustion.  That's the kind of pursuit passion requires.  And it hurts.  It's why many folk give up on their dreams.

Let me explain.  Think about the things you've pursued or are pursuing passionately: new job, back to college, college for the first time, starting a business, restarting a business, career change, a man, a woman, your kids.  Any hurt in any of those?  Exactly.  Why?  Because your destiny or at least a part of your destiny may be or is in there somewhere.  In it.  In them.  Maybe it’s their destiny that you’ve been called to help them find and fulfill.  Regardless, to walk tall in your destiny, or help someone else reach and realize theirs, you have to be willing to sacrifice the short-term pleasures for the long-term rewards.  

I’ll share a quick story with you.  When I first got my dog, Bruizer, I was taken completely out of my comfort zone.  The entire experience was new to me.  The biggest challenge (there were many)?  Knowing when he needed to go out to do his business.  Housebreaking him.  It was really pushing me to my limits!  I/We had to figure this out quickly or one of us wasn’t going to make it!  See, I'm a "sign guy".  No, not that kind of sign guy.  The kind who puts up motivational signs around his home, office, and even in the car.  I type them up in PowerPoint, print them, and hang them.  Back then, one of my signs said, "Short-Term pain for Long-Term gain".  I had to sacrifice my easy way of life, cleaning up after myself around the house and being responsible for my own bathroom duties, if you will, and tend to his.  Short-term pain.  Now?  We're old pros, Bruizer and I. That short-term pain turned into long-term gain. 

Bruizer at 3 months old

Why?  Passion.  I was passionate about him and his success.  I was passionate about getting this right.  I was passionate about keeping my house clean.  Because I was so passion about it, it cost me.  Not financially.  Although, that was an aspect of it.  But how many of y’all know that that's a small piece of the pie?  Right.  Back to the point.  It cost me.  It “hurt.”  I remember asking myself, “Why is this happening?  What was I thinking?” "Somebody make it stop!"  "Make it go away!"  Passion.  Hurt.  Sacrifice.  10pm.  2am.  6am.  Those are the times that I had to take Bruizer out if I was going to help him be successful at this housebreaking thing.  In the dead of winter of 2008-2009.  Bitter cold.  Lots of snow and ice.  See, you may think I'm smart, because I write and have a couple of degrees.  Sike!  Fooled ya!  Smart folk don't buy non-housebroken (yes, I make words up) puppies.  In the winter.  In Ohio.  See not very smart. :-) 

But that little guy who had me up in the wee hours putting his lil’ paws on my boots to keep them warm, he was a part of my destiny.  But I had to make some sacrifices.  I had to be more concerned about his success than I was my lack of sleep.  I had to hurt.  I had to be passionate.  “So, Eric.  Your destiny was housebreaking your dog?”  No.  It's part of what led me to my destiny.  Speaking.  Teaching.  Writing.  Coaching.  Challenging.  Changing lives.  It also taught me: What I'm capable of.  What I'm able to withstand. That experience was a part of my destiny, because it brought me here with you today.  To challenge you.  To charge you.  To begin equipping you. To help you find your destiny.  To tell you that, "Even when you don't fit, you're fit". Y'all like that, don't you?  Good, ‘cause it’ll be coming soon in a series near you!  :-)  

Seriously, though.  It is usually the case that during those times you're the most fit.  By the way, anytime you don't fit you should get excited!  Why?  Because you're about to grow in major ways!  You'll be tested.  You'll be tried.  However, if you stay in the fire, you'll find out that you're fit for the purpose.  Passion.  Hurt.  Destiny.  PHD and PhD.  Because, in the end, oh, you've become quite philosophical.  And you’ll feel as though you've earned many doctorates.  In Passion.  In Hurt.  In Destiny.  You'll have suffered.  You’ll have counted and paid the cost.  All that'll be left will be for you to take the stage and collect your hard-earned PhD.  

One Way

"You want it to be one way.  But it's the other way."  Those words were uttered by the character Marlo Stanfield, played brilliantly and menacingly by Jamie Hector in the HBO Series The Wire.  Marlo says this to a security guard at a convenience store after the guard followed him out of the store.  He follows him out of the store, because Marlo brazenly put a few lollipops in his pocket and walks out without paying for them.  The security guard approaches with caution, because he knows that Marlo is not to be trifled with.  He confronts him about stealing the lollipops and that's when Marlo delivers the opening lines of this post.  One Way.  

There are some folk in our lives who only want it to be One Way.  No matter the issue.  It's going to be this way.  And you know what?  I agree with them.  I know what you're saying.  "Eric, are you ok?  One Way?  That doesn't sound like you, man."  Newsflash, friend.  It is me.  And it's One Way for me.  

There are some places I go where they don't want me to be me.  Man, they don't even want me.  They want me to hide or at the very least, duck and cover.  I told 'em, "Look, I'm unashamed.  So do what you have to, but this is who I am.  Just call me Mr. One Way."  They want me to conform.  To "fit".  I can't though.  I just can't.  I mean, why should I have to hide?  There are plenty of folk like me.  Just look around.  We're everywhere.  I know some folk would like to get rid of us.  Or at the very least they'd like us to shut up.  You know, be seen but not heard.  Consider ourselves fortunate that we're allowed to be here.  Let alone speak.  Naw, dawg.  That won't work for me.  Remember, I'm Mr. One Way.

Because I'm Mr. One Way, I've got to start the way I want to finish.  That's exactly what I've done.  From day one.  It's who I've been.  Who I am.  Conventional wisdom would have me wear a mask.  It'd have me covered up.  It'd limit what I can say and do.  It'd have me assimilate.  It'd tell me, "Man, if they see you, what you really look like, it could ruin your business."  Really?  I mean, really???  Tell you what.  If that's the way it has to be, to that I say, "I'm ya Huckleberry."  

I can still hear you.  Now you're saying, "Eric, are you sure?  Is this how you want it to be?"  In a word, "Yes."  So let me be clear.  I am Mr. One Way.  I'm starting the way I will finish.  If you want me, then you need to know who and what you're getting.  You're getting a man of honesty and integrity.  A man who is faithful.  A man who keeps his promises even unto his own hurt.  A forgiving man.  More importantly, I'm a forgiven man.  A man who is a follower of Jesus Christ.  That's right.  I said it yet again.  Just as you've seen it in other posts and you'll see it in more of them.  It's under and by His principles that I operate my businesses.  Most importantly, it's how I live my life.  It's under, through, and by His grace that I live and breathe.  That I have or produce and create anything of any value or worth.

I concur with my man Polycarp who said, "Eighty and six years have I served Him, and he never did me any injury; how then can I blaspheme my King and Savior?"  Y'all know I'm not 86, but you get the point.  I run with Jesus, because He runs with me.  He always has.  And just because I've got more of a platform now, I'm supposed to act like I don't know Him?  Chil' please!  Somebody done told you wrong!  I'll do no such thing!  I'll do the exact opposite.  

So there it is.  You can say, "Eric owns and operates his businesses under Christian principles."  You can say, "Eric is a Christian who runs businesses."  Both are correct.   Although those are two things, there's still only One Way.  Or you can simply say, "Eric is Mr. One Way."  And that's cool with me.